The fire is out in the Bronx

Irony has once again reared its ugly head in the Bronx.

With Scott Proctor setting fire to his equipment in a bout of frustration after today's loss and the miniseries "The Bronx is Burning" coming to a television near you, flames seem to be a regularly recurring theme for the Pinstripes.

In fact, the only place the fire seems to be lacking in the Yankee universe is within the team itself.

In an effort to break the Bombers of their losing ways, skipper Joe Torre threw a little bit of a hissy fit and cancelled batting practice before Thursday night's game.

So often we've heard of teams in similar situations, when offered the opportunity to take a day off, instead choosing to come in extra early for additional batting practice, video studying, or even team bonding.

The classiest team in sports, of course, took the afternoon off.

According to the New York Post, the Yankees clubhouse "was nearly empty with players, save for a few pitchers who reported early," at 4 p.m. "The final arrivals - Johnny Damon, Hideki Matsui and Luis Vizcaino - showed up at 5:30, a half-hour before the official reporting time."

I could certainly understand some guys, especially those that are hurting, taking the afternoon to rest their aching limbs in preparation for this weekend's slate of games. But you're telling me there wasn't one Yankee starter who could have used a couple of extra hours in the batting cage right now? Where was Captain Intangibles himself, Derek Jeter, to call a team-only infield session?

He must have been doing some shopping on 34th street instead.

Admittedly, the Yankees will always be a serious threat in the American League as long as their payroll exceeds $200 million dollars. On the other hand, this team has been doing everything they can to display their complete inability to compete this year. Roger Clemens and Andy Pettitte have beeen pitching in middle relief. Wil Nieves, who is hitting worse than Julio Lugo right now, is being thrust into the lineup once a rotation to cater to the whims of petulant "ace" Mike Mussina, and catcher Jorge Posada's bat is so desperately needed in those games that they have him taking reps at first base. Kei Igawa turned back into a pumpkin again tonight as the Yanks were one-hit by Oakland starter Chad Gaudin tonight en route to yet another loss.

As we stand on the precipice of July, the Yankees are dead in the water. I have no doubt that they will sputter and come back to life at some point before they pack it in for good this season. The Red Sox must do their damndest to hammer as many nails into the pinstriped coffin as they can before the Yanks make their impending run at the division title.

We may feel good for now, but as the old saying goes, I'll finally feel confident when we have a five game lead with four games to play.

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Justice from the Baseball Gods

A hush came over the cavernous hearing room. Walled in dark mahogany, the room wreaked of formality but colorful pennants representing all teams from the beginning of baseball history hanging from the ornately carved ceiling gave the room a vestige of vitality. The immense door to the judges' chamber opened and everyone rose. Five figures majestically made their way to a row of high backed leather chairs behind a marble raised desk. They were formally robed in white and each wore a powder blue baseball cap, bill forward, with the letters "BG" stitched on the front. Once they were seated, everyone else in the courtroom then sat down.

A secretary stood and read from a scroll. "Here ye, here ye. The court of the Baseball Gods is now in session. Presiding Deity HayZeus will now announce the Gods' decision in the case against the New York Yankees."

The Baseball Gods met in monthly sessions to rule on various issues involving America's Pastime. This particular session was the most significant, taking place in March prior to the season beginning. At this session, the Gods would make decisions that would have year long effects on the teams and individuals involved.

The ruling of the court which HayZeus was about to hand down involved a suit brought against the Yankees which charged that the New Yorkers had used their overwhelmingly unfair resources to attempt to circumvent the spirit of the sport...that of true competition.

Prosecuter Fadagudov DeGame had presented a compelling case that outlined the Yankees' systemic use of money and power to try and take over the sport. DeGame methodically illustrated how the Yankees began the payroll spiral in the 70's when they signed the first big money free agent Jim "Catfish" Hunter and then Reggie Jackson and their dealings through to the present day when they conintued to overpay for mediocre talent like Jason Giambi and Bobby Abreu. He showed how by consistently outbidding everyone, they had amassed a $200 million payroll, which was as much as five times that of some teams. DeGame demanded that the Gods at long last come down hard on the Yanks.

The Yankees defense team led by Billy Martin had argued that the Yankees had done nothing wrong. He asserted that they had simply done everything within the rules to gain a legitimate advantage over their opponents. The defense also noted that despite the Yanks reckless spending, the Gods had prevented the Bombers from winning a championship since 2000 and they hadn't even won a playoff series since 2004. Wasn't that punishment enough?

They also argued that they were not alone in trying to gain an advantage through use of overwhelming resources. Rivals like the Boston Red Sox and New York Mets had also overspent, they retorted, and it was unfair for the Gods to single out the Yankees.

The defense had been presented well, and all present were in great anticipation of what the Gods would finally decide. Everyone held their breath as HayZeus leaned forward into the microphone to deliver the ruling of the august body.

"We were impressed with the level of defense that the Yankees put forth in this case," HayZeus began. "However, the prepoderance of evidence is simply too great. We feel that the Yankees have clearly crossed the line. As for their arguments regarding the Red Sox and Mets...well, we took care of the Sox last August as you may recall and we dealth with the Mets in the 2006 posteason. Their frustrating loss to the mediocre Cardinals was not fate. It was us.

"But the question before the court today involves the Yankees. And our decision is unanimous," HayZeus intoned.

"On the charge of gross overspending and perverting the competitive spirit of the game we find the New York Yankees.....guilty as charged."

The crowd erupted in a cacophonous hubbub and HayZeus banged his gavel loudly to quiet the crowd and restore order. Fadagudov DeGame leaned back in his chair at the prosecution table and smiled. The veins in Martin's neck throbbed.

HayZeus continued. "And now we are ready for sentencing."

The Deity unrolled another piece of parchment and began to read from it. "The Yankees will suffer the punishment for their crimes in 2007. The following will befall them this season:

"Early in the year, the Yankees will suffer a series of debilitating injuries, especially to their pitching staff. Chien-Ming Wang and Mike Mussina will be struck with hamstring injuries and be placed on the DL early in the season. Carl Pavano will have a few starts and then will not pitch again this year. Jeff Karstens will have his leg broken by...and this represents treble damages...Julio Lugo of the Red Sox. Phil Hughes will show some promise before he too will be struck down with an injury. Darrel Rasner will suffer a broken finger."

"Finally, the Yankees will overpay Roger Clemens who in "Joe Hardy-like fashion, will show his age become an average five inning starter. This will cause the Yankees to roll out 11 rookies as starting pitchers which in turn will then force Joe Torre to overuse and burn out his bullpen. "

"As for position players, Hideki Matsui will also go on the DL and Johnny Damon will start to break down. His back, legs and ribs will continue to deteriorate. Bobby Abreu will eventually revert to the non-entity he became in Philly. Giambi will also continue to suffer leg injuries and ultimately be unmasked as the steroid abuser he is. This will force Torre to use light hitting, big talking Doug Mientkiewicz and Josh Phelps at first base. Eventually, Mientkiewicz will nearly get his head taken off by Mike Lowell, suffer a broken jaw and be lost for months.

"Arod will have a great April but will come crashing to earth in May. Most importantly, we are going to pull the heart right out of the Yankees. Brian Cashman actually helped us with that one by trading Gary Sheffield. But by the end of June the Yankees will become a listless bunch, looking old and tired. We will then let things take their natural course from there."

"We have spoken," HayZeus concluded. He then rapped his gavel sharply.

Martin flew into a rage, tossing chairs across the room and trying to get at the Gods before being restrained by the court officers. The large crowd of disgruntled Yankee fans filed out of the courtroom mumbling about how unfair the ruling of the Baseball Gods was. However, by the time most of them had reached the front door, they had discarded their Yankee caps and had donned their Mets hats.

As the large door to the chamber began to close, the voice of the secretary could be heard intoning: "Next up for the Baseball Gods, the case against Barry Bonds...."

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Hurly Buehrle

Rumors are swirling around Yawkey Way regarding the possible acquisition of Chicago's Mark Buehrle to bolster the rotation for a playoff run. Although it is true that a club can never have enough good pitching, I don't think the benefits Buehrle would bring outweighs the king's ransom we'd need to pay for four months of his service.

Mark Buehrle, the 28-year old lefthander who has spent his entire career on the South Side of the Windy City, has accumulated a 3.80 lifetime ERA and a 101-70 record during the eight seasons and 1,521 innings he spent on the hill for the ChiSox. He has a lifetime WHIP of 1.249, striking out 5.2 and walking 2 batters per nine innings.

Reports out of Boston have indicated that Theo and the crew are considering Buehrle only has a mid-season rental, implying that they'd use him for the stretch run and then allow him to test the free agent waters. This is a normal gambit, which would provide insurance for a questionable Curt Schilling and keep the lefty out of any of our rival's rotations. The names being thrown about in speculation, however, are the marquee names of our minor league system: Buchholz, Bowden, Ellsbury, and Lowrie. If the front office saw Buehrle as the #3 starter for this ballclub for the forseeable future, I could fathom allowing one of these guys to leave; sacrificing these prospects to marginally improve the team with the best record in baseball seems a bit shortsighted.

Although he is a talented hurler and has a World Series ring to his credit, there are several factors that indicate to me that he may not be the best fit to contribute to a playoff-bound Sox club. Firstly, flyball-pitching lefthanders starting at Fenway Park are one of the leading causes of chest pain across New England. Also, most free agents who have made their maiden voyage to Boston in the past couple of years require a significant amount of time to adjust to the Northeastern pressure-cooker. Lugo, Drew, Crisp, Beckett, Pena, and Renteria are just a few marquee players who took a significant amount of time to adjust to the bright lights of Fenway.

An important element of this transaction, however, is the fact that Buehrle is a Type A free agent, meaning whoever he ends the year with can offer him arbitration and will receive either another season from the southpaw at about $11 million dollars or a pair of compensatory draft picks in 2008. With the way the Sox have been drafting in the past couple of years, Yawkey Way could consider these two picks to carry more value than a pair of mid-level prospects.

So if Theo can lure Buehrle to Boston for a handful of minor-league filler we've never heard of, it'll be tough to complain. If he pays through the nose for this marginal upgrade, however, I'll be sure to scoff and shrug loud enough for all our loyal readers to hear.

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Aces Wild

With two of the best pitchers in the majors, Josh Beckett and Jake Peavey going at it today, I thought is was a good time to do a Bill Simmons-ripoff running diary of what might prove to be one of the best games of the season.

4:00 pm - I feel good about this one Despite looking helpless last night against Chris Young, I think the Sox will bounce back today. They are 18-4 in days games which bodes well for the contest today in sunny San Diego.

4:05 pm - Looks like a continuation of last night for the Sox in the first inning. Peavey is filthy. San Diego is for real based on their pitching. Watching the Sox feebly flail away at Greg Maddox, Young and now Peavey has been painful.

4:16 pm - Second Inning. Home plate umpire Dana Demuth is having a rough day to say the least. I don't blame the hitters and pitchers from both teams from scratching their heads. He just called a strike on J. D. Drew that was at least six inches outside. On the very next pitch, he obviously comes back with a makeup call on a ball that is right on the corner.

4:23 pm - The Padres are desperately trying to help the Sox by getting Peavey killed in this one. First Baseman Adrian Gonzalez waits for Peavey to cover first on a routine grounder he should have handled himself. Drew nearly tramples Peavey rushing over to cover. Then after Jason Varitek drops in a seeing eye blooper into short left field, Shortstop Khalil Greene and left fielder Russel Branyan collide. Branyan picks up the ball as Varitek barrells toward an uncovered third base. He tries to lead a diving Peavey who came over to cover. Tek nearly decapitates Peavey. This is very good for the BoSox. At this rate, Peavey will be dead by the fourth inning.

4:28 pm - Wtih two down and Tek on third Useless Lugo steps in. He takes three balls and I find myself hoping they walk him so Beckett will get a chance to drive in the run. That's how bad it has gotten for the $36 million bust out shortstop. Tito gives Lugo the green light on 3-0 and Mr. .193 fouls one off then takes a called strike. He predictably dribbles one to second base to kill another scoring chance.
Three and a half more years of Lugo at $9 mil per year is going to be difficult to fathom. Who is Theo going to pay this offseason to take this mistake off our hands.

4:40 pm - Third inning. Crisp is coming around finally. He drills one into the gap for a hit. Mike Cameron and Cruz Jr. look at each other as it drops between them. Think Cameron was having flashbacks of the horrific collision he was involved with several years ago with the Mets?

4:45 pm - Alex Cora battles Peavey in a great at-bat, fouling off pitch after pitch. He finally drills a single to right to put runners on first and second. Crisp and Cora made Peavey throw 17 pitches and ended up with two on and none out for this efforts. He is up to 50 pitches already. How to work him boys.
Speaking of Cora, he would look good at short for a few games in a row.

4:47 pm - Big Papi gets a single between first and second to score Coco. 1-0 Sox and Cora moves to third.

4:50 pm - Manny lifts a sac fly to right to score Cora to make it 2-0 Sox. That may be all we get today. Beckett is going to have to make that stand up, I fear. Although the pitch count continues to rise for Peavey. Of course the Padre bullpen is no day at the beach either.

4:55 pm - Geoff Blum butchers a ground ball but they give Drew a basehit on it. I'm thinking they will change that later. Clearly an error. First and third and two outs.

5:00 pm - Mike Lowell dinks one into right and Papi steams home to make it 3-0. Nice hand slide as Cruz Jr. hesitates just enough to allow Ortiz to get in there.

5:01 pm - Tek drills one to deep left, but Branyan runs it down to end the 23 minute inning.

5:05 pm - Good news from out of town. SF is leading the Yanks 2-0 in the third.

5:06 pm - Blum singles, advances on Peavey's sacrifice bunt and goes to third on a sac fly. Two down and runner on third. Routine grounder to Lugo, who is apparently still in there for his defense. He pumps and throws a one hopper at Papi's feet. Ortiz scoops it and saves Lugo from more embarassment. Lugo is awful.

5:10 pm - Top of the fourth. Lugo leads off. Isn't that the way it always happens? The guys who makes the terrible play leads off the next inning. He hits a harmless grounder to third. He is now 0 for his last 25. Ugh.

5:12 pm - Beckett works a full count and drills a single to right. Shouldn't Beckett be batting eighth and Lugo ninth?

5:18 pm - No further damage but Peavey is up to 92 pitches after four innings. Action in the SD bullpen.

As an aside, the Padre fans came to play today. They are noticably louder than they were the last two days and the "Let's go Padres" chants are clearly drowning out the large Sox contingent.
Kevin, Corey and I witnessed this phenomenon first hand last year when we went to Philadelphia for a weekend series. On Friday and Saturday, Sox Nation took over Citizens Bank Park, clearly embarrassing the home town team. But on Sunday, the Philly folks were on a mission and were not going to be overrun by out of towners. We sat next to a particularly vocal one who was borderline violent and was not to be outshouted. Sitting quietly in our Sox gear, we didn't even try.

5:30 pm - Top of the fifth. Manny and Drew lead off with singles and Remy opines that all the running around Peavey had to do early may have taken something out of him. That may be the case since he is clearly not the same pitcher he was early in the game. He is approaching 100 pitches.

5:37 pm - Two out and Lugo coming up. Please walk him. No such luck, easy grounder to short to force Drew and end the inning. Why is Lugo playing while Youk and Pedroia are sitting out? Tito is going to have to sit this stiff soon. He is now 0 for his last 26.

5:44 pm - Gapper by pinch hitter Tremell Sledge (which I believe is a made up name) knocks in two to make it a one run game.

5:53 pm - No further damage as Beckett pitches out of it but now Sox lead is 3-2 after five.

5:55 pm - Top of the sixth. Royce Ring in to pitch. These can't be real names.

5:59 pm - Cora singles up the middle. He is 2 for 2 with a walk and an HBP. He has been on more today than Lugo has for the entire month of June.

6:00 pm - Papi strikes out and tosses his bat again. He got into a beef with Demuth on the second called strike. He probably needs to knock that off. As my two umpiring sons can attests, barking at the umps only makes things worse in the long run.

6:21 pm - Guzman crushes one but Manny hauls it in just in front of the 357 ft sign. At Fenway that is on the garage roof and the score is tied 3-3. Why would you build a beautiful ballpark but give it the dimensions of an airport? I like a good pitchers' duel as much as the next guy, but not every night. I don't see the Padres getting many free agent sluggers in this canyon. The Pitchers would be interested though.

6:28 pm - Bottom of the seventh. Beckett strikes out Cruz to end the inning. He's over 100 pitches and that's probably it for him. Good job. He clearly outdueled Peavey today.

6:32 pm - Top of the eighth. Tek hits a howitzer into the beach in right center to make it 4-2. Scott Linebrink grooved a 3-0 fastball and Tek croaked it.

6:34 pm - Lugo is up. It's 3-0. Maybe he'll walk!

6:34 pm - Strike one called.

6:34 pm - Strike two called.

6:34 pm - Foul ball.

6:35 pm - Ball four!

6:35 pm - It's been so long since Lugo has been on base, he is clearly confused and trots down the third base line. (only kidding).

6:36 pm - Beckett is hitting which means he is going out for the eighth. Not sure I like that. He fake bunts and slaps a liner to Linebrink who grabs it and promptly doubles Lugo off first. That's more like it. Back to the bench Julio.

6:45 pm - Beckett gets Greene to pop out to end the inning. Great job. That will definitely be it for him.

6:53 pm - Sox go quickly in the ninth and Papelbon is in to close it out.

6:55 pm - Pap K's Branyan on high heat for the first out.

6:57 pm - Pap K's Kouzmanoff on 3 fastballs

7:00 pm - Easy grounder to Cora at second to end it. Pap was unhittable. Gee, don't you wish we kept him as a fifth starter. I'm sure Piniero would have come in and done the same thing.

Taking two of three from the Pads is huge. The Sox only scored seven runs in the series but that is what pitching and timely hitting will do for you.

Beckett is now 11-1 best in the majors.

This San Diego team looks like the class of the NL. With that pitching, they will smother the Mets in a short series. The real question is whether they have enough hitting.

The Sox took four of six winning the first two series on this brutal road trip. Now on to Seattle and even one of three there will give them a successful 5-4 trip. Then back to home cooking at Fenway and a much easier July.

Looking Good!

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What can you get for $875,000?

We all know that the economic environment of Major League Baseball hasn't been based in any form of reality for the better part of twenty years. This alternate reality was taken to a new level this week, however, as the $28-million-dollar man Roger Clemens took the hill in Denver for the New York Yankees.

The math has been done over and over again in the media, but I'm so giddy that I have to put it in writing once again.

Roger, who is making approximately $875,000 a start, tossed 90 pitches and gave up 4 runs during his 4 1/3 inning offering on Thursday night.

That's almost $202,000 an inning.

That's about $10,000 a pitch.

In other words, if I had the money Roger made throwing the four balls that constituted the only walk he gave up on the night, I could buy Sox season tickets for all four members of my family.

And if I got his share of the check for his two offerings that left the yard, I could just about pay my grad school bills.

But baseball exists in an alternate dimension. Let's make some more useful comparisons.

Jon Papelbon had a pretty good season last year, right? He made approximately $335,400 for his season of work. So for that chunk of change, you could either have almost 70 innings of 0.92 ERA...or you could have the 2nd and 3rd inning of Clemens' Thursday performance, where he threw 41 pitches, allowing 2 runs and 3 hits.

I'm cherry picking, of course. Rudy Seanez made $1,900,000 off the Sox last year, and I'd rather have two Clemens starts than another season of Rudy.

But the bell needs to be answered by the Yankees. This is a terrible contract for an over-the-hill pitcher. He's got a 1-2 record and he hasn't pitched to an American League team yet. Sure, this team needed to shake things up, but teams with $200 million dollar payrolls should have the depth to withstand injuries to a couple of starters.

But more power to them, since they have the money. There are other teams that have the financial resources to make obscene and irrational deals like this, but they don't consider that ability reason enough to make poor business decisions.

But what do I know. I haven't won any World Series this century either.

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Me and Julian Down by the Ballyard

Has any player in recent Red Sox history turned the fan base around in more dramatic fashion than Julian Tavarez? From the doghouse...with the emphasis on "dog" in early 2006...to fan favorite in 2007, the quirky Tavarez has turned out to be fun to watch and one of Theo's better moves.

When the Sox signed Tavarez in the offseason following the 2005 season, we in Boston knew little about him. Most looked at him as a National League fruitcake, best known for breaking his pitching hand in a one round loss to the dugout phone in St. Louis. Sox fans also knew him for offering up the game winning two run gopher ball to Mark Bellhorn in Game 1 of the 2004 World Series.

He got off on the wrong foot with the Sox by whacking Joey Gathwright of the Devil Rays in a spring training game which cemented his reputation as a major loose canon. When he rejoined the Sox he proceeded to stink up the joint. He gave up 6 runs in his first 8 1/3 innings and posted a 5.40 ERA in April. And he heard it from the fans, who did not appreciate his performances.

He then commited the mortal sin of calling out the Sox fans and complained about how Red Sox nation treated its players. The handwriting appeared to be on the wall. Julian was not long for the Fenway hothouse.

Then a funny thing happened. As the Sox began to unravel in August and Tito was frantically searching for arms, he landed on Tavarez to give him a spot start on August 31. Julian's start was inauspicious as he gave up three runs in the first inning. But then he pitched two more scoreless innings before being taken out.

In his second start on September 4, Tavarez shut out the defending World Champion White Sox for six innings before tiring and giving up a pair of runs in the seventh. The Sox went on to win 3-2.

From there, Tavarez continued to play hard, something that can't be said for his hamstrung buddy Manny Ramirez. The rubber armed pitcher started four more games, winning three of them. In the process, he began earning back the admiration of the Sox fans for his attitude and work ethic.

He looked destined for some type of set up role in the 2007 Sox bullpen when the Sox brass toyed with the ill-fated "Let's-Make-The-Best-Closer-In-Baseball-a-Starter" experiment with Jonathan Papelbon. But when cooler heads prevailed and Pap was rightfully installed at the back end of the bullpen, the number five starting slot was up for grabs. Tito gave it to Tavarez as a reward for his end of 2006 effort.

Everyone knew he was just holding the spot awaiting the return of Jon Lester, who would quickly supplant the veteran. But something interesting happened. Tavarez became one of the best fifth starters in the game. He came out to pitch every fifth day and never complained about what his ultimate role would be, again endearing himself to the Boston fans.

Along the way, Tavarez also entertained us. Rolling a ball to first base instead of throwing it...TWICE...and playing traffic copy on grounders to the infield. He also endured a head massage from his buddy Manny that had NESN's Jerry Remy and Don Orsillo in stitches. He also reached base on a swing bunt. With Julian, you never know what you are going to get.

As a matter of fact, when my brother was planning a trip to Arizona to watch the Sox play the Diamondbacks, we worked through the rotation and determined he would be seeing Tavarez on the hill. He was dissapointed. But I reminded him that he was actually going to see the most entertaining pitcher on the Sox staff.

So I sit here tonight watching Tavarez mow down the Braves as the Sox cruise 8-0. It's the top of the seventh, and Tavarez is still out there. Forget that in his last start he limped off the mound. No babying him. "I'll be out there to pitch," he promised. And pitching he is. Through seven, he has allowed only three hits to a team that beat up Curt Schilling two nights ago.

After losing four of his first five starts (three of those to Kevin Millwood, Roy Halladay and Johan Santana), he is about to win his fourth game to up his record to 5-4. His ERA will be lowered to 4.50 from the 4.97 with which he entered the game. More importantly, the Sox have now won 8 of his 13 starts and have given them the luxury of allowing Lester to come back slowly from cancer. Not bad for a fifth starter.

Now with Schilling on the DL, Tavarez may not be leaving the rotation in the near future after all. Good for him.

He's earned it.

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