Kevin plays GM

Tomorrow is Trade Deadline Day, and you know what that means: lots of speculation and little action. To aid in the public discourse, I'll throw another chunk of speculation out there and run through the move I'd be looking to make if I was in Theo's chair.

Speculation is running rampant around the league that Mark Teixeira will be moved before four o'clock, and many clubs have thrown their hat in the ring. The Sox would surely be improved by adding his bat, but the cost it will take to aquire him is has probably risen above what his added value to the team would be. This does not mean, however, that we shouldn't still be working the phones to become involved as a part of a larger deal.

The best offer I have seen thus far comes from Atlanta, where the Braves are offering pitcher Matt Harrison (age 21), shortstop Elvis Andrus (age 18), and catcher Jarrod Saltalamacchia (age 22) for Teixeira's services. As Red Sox GM, the most appealing name to me in that deal is not Teixeira's, but Saltalamacchia's: in an era where productive catchers are dying out like the dinosaurs, Saltalamacchia could potentially be the man to succeed Jason Varitek in Boston. Perhaps if we put a phone call in to Texas and placed a preliminary offer on Salty's head, it would inspire them to close the deal with the Braves.

Using Baseball Prospectus' WARP statistic (Wins Above Replacement Level), the Texas-Atlanta deal as currently constructed would yield Atlanta approximately 3 additional wins down the home stretch of this season (Teix=35.4, Salty=22.7, Harrison=7.9, Andrus=1.8). Projecting over the next five seasons, the deal would be just about even (Atlanta would come out about a game and a half ahead over the course of eight hundred games), but after that season Teix would be 32 and the Texas prospects would be 27, 26, and 23. It is always risky when you trade a star just entering his prime, but any drop-off from Teixeira or sharp rise from any of the prospects would make this deal a slam dunk.

So where do the Sox fit in? Texas doesn't seem to be too enamored with Saltalamacchia, who is the keystone of the Atlanta package. The Rangers are supposedly much more interested in young pitching. They are also trotting out the corpse of Sammy Sosa (now with less cork!) as a designated hitter. They obviously aren't planning on contending this year, and therefore should be willing to part with older players on the payroll.

Maybe we could help out.

Jon Lester has had an amazing struggle to make his way back to the big leagues, and he sure looks like someone who could be a top-flight pitcher for years to come. On the other hand, he regularly has problems hitting the strike zone and his value may be higher right now than it will ever be again. It would be the unsentimental move to part with him right as he's reached the top of the mountain, but we here in the front offices are in the business of winning baseball games.

Additionally, my previous post detailed the issues that surround Sox slugger Wily Mo Pena. Although one night shouldn't override the abomination that has been the rest of this season, perhaps we can catch lightning in a bottle and sell Wily Mo's potential, just as it was sold to us last spring.

The other element of this deal would be recently injured Rangers reliever Akinori Otsuka. The Rangers had been shopping this guy agressively before his injury, but now the price has probably dropped precipitously. He's currently on the 15-day DL and he is 35 years old; he has no use to Texas at this point. If the Sox could land him now and let him heal up through August, he would be a huge boost to the bullpen in the playoffs - let's not forget he picked up 32 saves as a closer last year. Should he be able to return to health in the next month, the Sox could carry a bullpen of Papelbon - Okajima - Otsuka - Delcarmen - Lopez - Timlin - Tavarez/Gabbard/Lester/Snyder into the postseason. And that would be pretty good, for those of you scoring at home.

So we offer Texas Jon Lester (age 23, five-year WARP=61.9), Wily Mo Pena (25, 75.8), and a throw-in pitcihng prospect (for this example I'll use David Pauley, because I know his WARP=14.8) in exchange for the recently aquired Saltalamacchia and the injured Otsuka. Over the next five seasons, the Rangers could expect to add about ten more wins from this transaction, in addition to immediately adding a young left-handed starter and Sosa's full-time replacement at DH.

At the end of the day, Texas will have dealt Teixeira and Otsuka for a major-league ready starting pitcher (Lester), a major-league hitter (Pena), two pitching prospects (Harrison and Pauley) and a young shortstop (Andrus). That's not a bad haul for a star and a rapidly-aging setup man.

The Sox, for their labors, would add a reliever who will directly impact the ballclub's playoff chances (we would at this point have four closers in the bullpen) in addition to adding the heir to Varitek's throne who is a switch-hitter and can man first base in a pinch. He would take Pena's spot on the roster and we could still keep Mirabelli around to caddy for Wake, though maybe Salty could take some bullpen sessions and see how the knuckler treats him while looking towards the future.

Good pitching beats good hitting and good catchers are hard to find. Jon Lester will always be a fan favorite in this town, but this bounty is just too much for the Sox to turn down.

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2004 vs. 2007: Compare and Contrast

With the trading deadline looming, there's lots of talk surrounding the key deals Theo pulled off in 2004 that shook the Sox out of their malaise and propelled them to the promised land. This has led to the inevitable comparison of that 2004 team with the present 2007 edition of the Sox.

Even Mike Timlin weighed in recently, saying "we have a good team. If I'm trying to compare 2004 and 2007, yeah it's comparable."

So as we head into the last two months of the season, let's take a look at the current team and how it compares to the greatest Sox team since 1918.


When grinding down into the statistics, the similarities between the two teams is uncanny. The 2004 team finished 98-64, scored 949 runs and allowed 768 for a run differential of 181. This year's edition projects to 99-65 with 830 runs and 635 allowed for a RD of 195.

Team batting averages are almost identical with .282 in 2004 and 2.77 this year. On base percentage is .360 v .358 in favor of 2004 which also had a slugging percentage advantage of .472 v .439. The World Champs were more powerful banging out 222 homers vs. the projected 162 for 2007. Walks are almost identical at 659 v a projected 677. 2004 also has the edge in extra base hits at 620-projected 534.

I think it would be safe to say the Champs were a stronger hitting team over all.

Pitching is another story.

The Champs ERA was 4.18, but this year's crew is a half run better at 3.69. This year they project to allow 17% fewer runs (635-768), 6% fewer hits (1349-1430) and 18% fewer homer runs (159-131). Strikeouts project to be nearly even at 1132-1130 in favor of 2004.

Let's take a look position by position.

First Base: Kevin Millar vs Kevin Youkilis. Millar hit .297 with 18 homers and an OBP of .383, slugging percentage of .474 and 74 RBI. Youk is hitting .306, projects to 16 homers with an OBP of .402, slugging percent of .468 and 80 RBI. Doug Mientkiewicz was brought in to play late inning defense and I would argue that he was no better than Youk has been with the club. Advantage: Even.

Second Base: Mark Bellhorn vs. Dustin Pedroia. Bellhorn posted a .264 average, 17 homers, OBP of .373 and slugging pct of 444. Pedroia is at .315, projects to 6 homers, OBP of .389 and slugging pct of .315. Pedroia is much better with glove than Bellhorn who was reliable but not spectacular. Advantage : 2007.

Shortstop: Orlando Cabrera/Pokey Reese vs Julio Lugo. Cabrera/Reese hit .256 with 9 homers, OBP of .296 and 60 RBI. Lugo is struggling at .222, projects to 9 homers, OBP of .287 and 74 RBI. Cabrera made some spectacular plays in the field but Lugo has been solid as well. Lugo also offers more speed on the bases, when he's not getting picked off. The Champs have to be given the advantage here, but it is not as easy a call as you would have expected given Lugo's problems. If he continues his hot streak for the rest of the second half, Lugo could get this checkmark into the 2007 column by season's end. Advantage: 2004

Third Base: Bill Mueller vs Mike Lowell. Great matchup here with the Pro v the Pro. Mueller posted a .283 average, 12 homers, 57 RBI .365 OBP, and .446 Slugging. Lowell is at .306, projects to 24 homers and 115 RBI, .357 OBP and .506 slugging. Even though he is having a down year defensively, he is ultimately a better field than Mueller was. Advantage: 2007.

Left Field: Manny vs Manny. The Champ Manny had a monster year posting .308 BA, 43 homers, 130 RBI, .397 OBP and .613 slugging. This year's version of Manny still has the average at .306, but he projects to 27 homers and 101 RBI. His current OBP is .404 and slugging is 100 points off at .519. The fielding and baserunning and intangibles are still an adventure. Advantage: 2004.

Center Field: Johnny Damon vs. Coco Crisp. The Caveman was the toast of the town in 2004 with good reason. He hit .304 with 20 homers and 94 RBI's. His OBP was .380 and he slugged .477. Crisp has come on lately and has raised his average to .282. He projects to 8 homers and 64 RBI. His OBP is .335 and is slugging .410. Defensively, Coco is several notches above Damon although they both have popgun arms. Coco has become a solid player, but he has not approached Damon's ability to work the pitcher and create havoc at the top of the order. On the intangible scale, Damon was off the charts, willing to take the pressure off his teammates by facing the press every night. Coco, meanwhile, dresses in the hallway to avoid the media horde. Advantage: 2004.

Right Field: Trot Nixon/Gabe Kapler vs JD Drew. People forget that Nixon played only 48 games in '04 while the classy Kapler did most of the heavy lifting in right field. The two combined for a .287 average, 12 homers and 56 RBI. The duo had an OBP of .344 and a slugging pct of .450. Drew has been a disappointment with his .247 average and projected 9 homers and 61 RBI. His OBP is .356 and is slugging .375. Defensively, Drew is better than both Kapler and Nixon but not enough to make up the gap in hitting from Nixon/Kapler. Advantage: 2004.

Catcher: Tek vs. Tek. Varitek had a career year in his contract season in 2004, hitting .296 with 18 homers and 73 RBI. His OBP was an impressive .390 and a solid slugging pct of .482. He has rebounded nicely from last season this year, hitting a nice .268 and projects to 14 homers and 68 RBI. He has a respectable .357 OBP and is slugging .421. His ability to handle the pitching staff is as good or better than it was three years ago, but there is no question he has not reached the same offensive prowess. Advantage: 2004

DH: Big Papi vs. Big Papi. The Champ Ortiz also had an eye-popping season hitting .301 with 41 homers and 139 RBI. He posted a .380 OBP and a lofty .603 slugging pct. This year, Papi has been banged up and his power shortage has been well documented. He has raised his average to .320 but he projects to only 25 homers and 94 RBI. His OBP is up at .433 but his slugging is off about 50 points to .554. There has also been a dearth of dramatic late inning heroics from the big guy which when you really think of it, couldn't go on forever. But the lack of power can't be ignored. Advantage: 2004.

Bench: Mientkiewicz, Pokie Reese, Dave Roberts, Mirabelli vs. Cora, Wily Mo Pena , Eric Hinske and Mirabelli. Mientkievicz (.238) was really only a defensive replacement and Reese (.221) and Roberts (.256) didn't make much of an impact in the regular season. Mirabelli actually contributed in 2004 hitting .281 in 160 plate appearances, with 9 homers and 32 RBI. This year, Belli has been awful, hitting .185 and projecting to 5 home runs and 17 RBI. Pena is useless, but Cora (.262) is probably the most valuable utility man in baseball. Hinske (.205) is a lefthanded bat with flashes of brilliance only. Advantage: Even.

Starting Pitching: Schilling, Pedro, Lowe, Wakefield, Arroyo v. Beckett, Matsusaka, Schilling, Wakefield, Tavarez. Pedro (16-9, 3.90, 227K's) and Schilling (21-6, 3.26, 203K's) led the Champs' staff, but people forget that Lowe was awful during the regular season, posting a 14-12 mark with an ERA of 5.42 that should have had him sending valentines to the Sox offense. Wakefield (12-10, 4.87) and Bronson Arroyo (10-9, 4.03) were .500 pitchers as the two horses carried the staff. Beckett has rebounded form a so-so year last season to anchor this year's staff. He projects to 20-6, 3.27, 184K's. Dice-K has been getting better all the time and projects to 19-11, 3.79, 214K's. This year's duo looks to be a step above the two aces in 2004. Schilling/Gabbard project to 16-6, .397, 157 K's. That is a big step up from Lowe's 2004 numbers. Wakefield has already equalled his 2004 record with a slightly better ERA. He projects to 19-14 if he keeps getting a decision in every game. Tavarez first half projects to 9-13 which is below Arroyo's performance. With Lester or Gabbard stepping in for the last two months, you have to think those numbers will improve. Advantage: 2007

Middle Relief: Curtis Leskanic, Mike Myers, Scott Williamson vs. Snyder, Pineiro, Lopez. Myers (5-1, 4.64, 32K) was a great situational lefty but Lopez (3.18 ERA) can do more. Snyder (2.95) has been great in long relief. Piniero (5.03) was a $4 mil bust, but was still better than Leskanic (5.19). Williamson was very effective with a 1.26 ERA but could not stay healthy. Advantage: 2007.

Set Up: Alan Embree and Mike Timlin vs. Okajima, Delcarmen and Timlin. Embree (4.13) and Timlin (4.13) were solid in 2004 but no match for this year's group. Okajima (0.89) has been unhittable allowing 5 runs all year. Delcarmen (1.40) looks like the power right hander the Sox have been looking for. This year's Timlin may be 41, but his 3.31 ERA is almost a run better than 2004 albeit with a lighter workload. Advantage: 2007.

Closer: Keith Foulke vs Jonathan Papelbon. Despite the fact that Foulke was the proverbial turd in the punch bowl as far as his personality was concerned, you have to give him his due on the mound. Simply put, the Sox would not have won it all without him closing out games. No one ever figured out how a closer could succeed with a change up as his out pitch, but he did it. He had a sparkling 2.17 ERA with 32 saves and struck out 79 in 72 innings while walking only 15. Paps is more likable and more traditional, coming out of the bullpen breathing fire with a smoking fast ball to match. He has a stingy 1.72 ERA and projects to 36 saves, and 93K's in 56 innings with 17 walks. As much as you want to give this checkmark to Paps, you have to face facts. Although Foulke delivered the Sox a ring you would have to ask a Bill Simmons-like question: If terrorists had your loved ones tied up in a basement and would kill them based on whether or not the game could be saved in the ninth, which one would you want on the mound?
Using that scenario, the decision is easy. Thank God that game wasn't last night, however. Advantage: 2007.

Manager: Tito vs Tito. This is a no brainer. Francona guided the Sox to their first championship in 86 years as a first year skipper. Now in his fourth year, Tito is turning into the best manager the Sox have had in my memory. Everyone points to Dick Williams in '67, but he never won it all, and he, like Billy Martin, had a short shelf life. He could command like a dictator but the troops would tune him out after a while. He only lasted two and a half years. I would take Tito after every other manager since then. He is a great combination of a manager who knows how to handle people. (Despite the fact that the blood thirsty media and shut in talk show callers want him to come out and rip players when they screw up, any good manager in business or otherwise knows that is not the way to get top performance from those who work for you). He has also shown the ability to use the massive amount of information available to him to make calls based on facts rather than gut. He may stay with players too long, but he is getting better in that regard and he has proven to be correct more often than not. The best testimony is that he is now in his fourth season, presided over a dissapointing '05 playoff loss, a second half '06 debacle and a month long swoon this season and there have been no calls for his head. That's because he has gone from being a good manager in '04 to an outstanding one this year. Advantage: 2007.

So to summarize, the '07 season wins the head to head by a checkmark count of 7-6-2, mostly on the strength of the pitching. If Manny and Papi were having "normal" years for them, it would have been a landslide 9-4-2 win for this year's club. If Drew and Lugo can get hot in the final two months, if Lowell and Youk hold up instead of fading as they have in the past, if Lester can top Tavarez's first half and Schilling can come back to anything close to his 2004 version, this year's team can clearly be better than 2004.

The question that remains is do they have the heart of the 2004 team. Do you see this year's team coming from a 0-3 deficit to win a series? They have not shown the ability to come back in mid season games. How are they going to react to the pressure of the pennant race and (hopefully), playoffs?

The 2004 team showed they could do it on the big stage when it mattered. Can this 2007 team do the same? We'll have to wait and see.

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The deadline approaches

With the trade deadline looming, it is critical to accurately assess both at what level a team will need to perform to succeed and also what pieces can be added to reach that level.

Let's assume a team can succeed with a batting average around .290, OBP at about .367, slugging near .450, and score about 5.25 runs a game. We also need a pitching staff that can maintain an ERA around 3.5, strike out about 7 batters per every 9 innings, and hold opposing batters to approximately a .240 average. Does this sound like a winner to you?

Because some would refer to such a club as a "monstrosity," a "mess," a "quagmire," and a "disaster" of which the designer "will have to live and die with."

I think he'll be alright. His club has put up those numbers so far in July alone.

We all know the baseball season is a marathon, not a sprint. A team is going to drop a series to a lousy Kansas City team every now and again, but they are just as likely to turn around and take 3 of 4 from a red-hot Cleveland club. This team is not perfect, but they are the holders of the best record in baseball right now and have been assembled to succeed in the postseason. Sure, we're not setting the world on fire and blowing teams away like the Bronx Bombers love to do, but I'm pretty sure a one-run victory counts as much in the end as a 22-3 blowout. I seem to recall the Patriots doing fairly well in adhering to this philosophy.

Now, just because the team is good doesn't mean it can't get better. What it does mean is that we don't need to blow anything up right now. As far as "quagmires...that can not easily be cleaned up" go, I think this one is looking pretty good.

The most glaring deficiency in the 25-man roster isn't so much a hole as it is Wily Mo Pena. He is simply the wrong man in the wrong place at the wrong time. It is obvious Dr. Wily needs playing time to succeed - but we're ignoring the fact that this guy will never turn into a Moneyball-era Sox player. I think Wily Mo could get 900 plate appearances next season and still be incapable of putting together the long, grinding, pitch-consuming at-bats that come so naturally to Kevin Youkilis and Dustin Pedroia.

Pena is the kind of guy that would have been a folk hero in 1952, when everybody hit home runs and walking was for little girls. He could have even had a charming off-season job, like digging holes or mining cole, that would have added to his larger-than-life mystique and perhaps given him a clever nickname.

In 2007, however, he sucks and everyone knows it. This is why it will be impossible for Theo to move him. The guy has a ton of upside and I really don't think you can even now complain about the trade that brought him here (even Tom liked it at the time), but he simply hasn't worked out and now we're stuck with him. He'd be a great fit in the National League, where the pitchers have apparently not yet been told that a thrown baseball can be made to curve if you throw it in a certain way. If Theo can get anything useful for Pena, you kind of have to take it just to free up the roster spot and bring up one of our AAA guys who can run, play defense, and at least look good while missing curveballs. Pena can do none of these things.

So what type of realistic return can we expect to get from Pena? We probably aren't going to be able to aquire a right-handed outfielder/pinch hitter for him, because that's what he is currently unable to do so why would anyone want to swap someone who can do these things for someone who can't? Perhaps we could grab a reliever, but at this point the best we could probably get is someone like Solomon Torres from the Pirates, who is 150 years old and would sit just below Mike "12 more appearances to 1,000" Timlin on the bullpen totem pole.

Pena's value, despite his great night tonight, could not be lower. Not only does everyone else not want him, they know we don't want him. At this point, we'll probably only be able to move him as a throw-in to a larger deal. If Theo can get anything for this hulking mass of raw potential, he deserves a ticker-tape parade.

That is, if he's not "dead" from the 62-40 "disaster" he has created.

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Far too often...

A Stand Must Be Made!




Too many times in the history of the Monster, players like JD Drew, who have great talent, are robbed of home runs due to slacking umpiring crews, as well as the dreaded shelf. So i designed a few ideas that might possibly end this horrible hassle which has pestered us for so many years.



This is the mouse trap design. Self explanatory, ball hits, they all go off, we clearly know the ball hits the shelf.

Pros: Its obvious that ball hits shelf. Left fielder is showered with snapping traps. Stadium laughs at left fielder.
Cons: Front row in great danger. Might be a hassle to clean up. Mice might frequent the shelf.



This is the Nail design. All nails are put in upside down with razor sharp tops. Ball comes hurtling down and plain sticks to the nails. Ball goes no where and we know its a homerun.

Pros: Perfect solution, no confusion.
Cons: Many hands could be lost trying to retrieve the stuck ball. Rain could possible rust nails making Fenway look less presentable.



This is the Moat design. With a 3 foot hollow tank put into the top of the monster, it would be filled with water. When ever a ball hits, a big splash would ensue, and we know its a home run. For more protection of fans, an alligator is put in and also trained to fetch balls for reuse in batting practice. Note: Fully trained alligator not required.

Pros: Clear indication of home run, flashy setup, ballpark first (alligator)
Cons: Possible danger with alligator 39 feet high, possible water spills on fans or Manny. Feeding gator could prove dangerous as well.



This is the chalk design. A 2 inch thick layer of chalk is put on top of the shelf so every time a ball hits it, POOF! we see a visible indicator that a ball has made contact with the home run zone.


Pros: Easy to see, easy to find (excess batters box chalk), easy to care for.
Cons: Allergic reactions, extremly messy, anything but rainproof.




This is the hard-surfaced clay prototype. HSCP for short. In this method you layer the shelf with a somewhat gooey hard textured type solid. The top is to be very similar to a hard ceiling. It could also be made out of a type of plastic so that rain wouldn't affect it. The idea is that when the ball hits the shelf it is scuffed as well as left with a yellowing mark. This, despite the tough competition, is personally my favorite idea.

Pros: Leaves a solid mark, and color to show that the ball struck the home run area. Easy to set up, maintain, and pretty foolproof.
Cons: Not many, maybe that after time it would wear down, but could be easiy replaced.

Overall I think Fenway staff should strongly consider either the water/alligator tank type of fix or this one.

Please leave some feedback on what you think of my designs, of maybe other possible ideas.

If any Fenway higher up feels they want to contact me to conference about any designs in this post, or possible buy one my email is CCondardo@gmail.com. Thanks for your time.

Oh yea, Lester is awesome.

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Rolling the dice on Lester

One year ago, he was the most valuable prospect in the Red Sox organization. In Spring Training, there was much clamoring in the Hub for the lefty to break camp with the big club. Now, as the trade deadline looms, the young fireballer with the significantly diminished trade value is joining the club as the second lefty in the rotation and a stopgap replacement until Curt Schilling is able to rejoin the club.

And there couldn't be a more perfect situation for Jon Lester.


Jon Lester showed much promise last season before being shelved due to his cancer scare and subsequent recovery. Many longed for him to take the fifth slot in the rotation coming out of camp with the assumption that he would be able to capture the form we saw at the end of the 2006 campaign. I, along with many others, argued that recovering from cancer was a far cry from the tired arms or balky knees that affect many other rookie pitchers, and Lester would need much more time regaining his form in a low-pressure environment. Thanks to the pleasant suprise that was Julian Tavarez's first half, Lester was afforded that time.

However, the human sideshow that is Tavarez has turned back into a pumpkin, and Lester's call has come. Although I would have liked to see him spend an entire year in Pawtucket to insure the complete recovery of his mental and physical strength, the circumstances in Boston make his transition appropriate. If the Sox were seven games down and searching for someone to save a crumbling rotation, I would be vehemently opposed to the move; but with a relatively comfortable cushion in the East and a confident top-4 in the rotation, the time is ripe for Jon's return.

He has had over 70 innings in Pawtucket and 14 starts to get back in the groove that was stolen from him last fall. His numbers have not been as impressive as they were before his first callup (4-5 in 14 starts, 3.89 ERA, 1.37 WHIP, 51 Ks and 31 walks), but many who have spent time with him in Rhode Island say he is chomping at the bit to get back to the bigs, and perhaps this trip will return him to the pitcher we saw last year.

The best case scenario here is that Lester provides a spark to the ballclub and stymies opponents who haven't yet faced him, earning wins for the club as they make the stretch run. The worst case scenario has a poor start or two before yielding his spot in the rotation to Schilling and heading back to Pawtucket. In any case, the lowered expectations have surely given Jon Lester the best possible opportunity to succeed.

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Hot Stove, Cool Music, Dead Team

I think we have a priority problem in Red Sox Nation.

Sox GM Theo Epstein is busy finalizing plans for his Hot Stove, Cool Music concert at Fenway in August. The way his Dead Sox are playing lately, he may want to start the event with a funeral dirge. Theo created this mess and he needs to answer for it.

But there is a reason he isn't spending any time trying to fix this dysfunctional bunch. Thanks to his mismanagement, there is really nothing he can do but strum his guitar and pray.

I don't want to panic, but I do want to be realistic. The Sox are in trouble which becomes more painfully obvious as their lead keeps getting chopped down game by game, like the drops of a Chinese Water Torture.

The Big Tuna, who spent some time down in Foxboro, used to say that you are what your record says you are. Since June 1, the Sox are 20-21, which spells mediocrity with a capital "M."
The Sox are lifeless and stagnant, treading water. With last night's pathetic loss, they have now lost 4 of 7 on this "easy" homestand. They don't have the ability, desire or fire to take advantage of a cupcake July schedule top heavy with home games and sub-.500 opponents. This malaise has allowed the Yankees to crawl out of the crypt and right back into the AL East race.

And the big problem is, the quagmire that Theo has created can not be easily cleaned up.

In 2004, the Sox were floundering in similar fashion at this time of the year. Theo was able to shake things up by trading a brooding Nomar Garciapparra and acquiring Orlando Cabrera, Doug Mientkiewicz and Dave Roberts. However, the way Theo has built this 2007 Edsel, such a bold stroke is not an option.

Everyone agrees that the light hitting, powerless lineup is in need of another bat. But where would you put it?

You're not going to replace Papi, Manny or Varitek. Youkilis, Lowell and Pedoria are your biggest producers so far. Crisp is starting to come on. That leaves the two biggest problems in Lugo (fly ball out with two down and the tieing run on third in the eighth last night) and Drew (harmless ground ball to lead off another fruitless ninth last night). Let's call them Theo's $106 million mistake. Theo will not bring in someone to replace either one of his prized offseason acquisitions. He also seems reluctant to admit what is obvious to everyone , that Wily Mo Pena can't play a lick. And Mirabelli, Wakefield's binky, couldn't hit the ground if he dropped his bat. (As a thought, can they DH for Mirabelli and let Wake hit for himself?)

So much for improving the lineup.

As for the pitching, the Julian Tavarez run clearly is at an end after four putrid performances in a row. Wake is a Jekyll and Hyde and the team desperately needs Schilling back. The relief corps has been a shining light, but when you lose two of three to the Kansas City "AAA" Royals you don't get to use your outstanding middle relief and closer.

So what is Rock Star Theo to do? Maybe get a veteran bat and dump Pena once and for all and perhaps another starter. Either one will cost too much and would probably be a bad move.

So Theo can just sit back, plan his big Rock Concert and do the following:

Pray for Schilling's return.

Hope Lowell and Youk don't fade in the second half as they did last year.

Have faith that Manny and Papi and JD Drew get hot.

Pray that Pedroia doesn't hit the rookie wall.

Say a novena that Beckett, Varitek, Papelbon, Okajima stay healthy.

Tito can shift the batting order around, but that may be akin to rearranging the deck chairs on the Titantic. I know, I can hear you now. "Hey they still have a (insert steadily decreasing single digit number here) game lead.

The fact of the matter is that this is Theo's baby, lock stock and pathetic barrel. He went crying in a gorilla suit to John Henry wanting complete control of the baseball operation and to make the big, bad Larry Lucchino stop questioning his decisions. Well he got his wish. And this is the monstronsity he has constructed. The largest payroll in the history of the Sox that has an on base percentage that will knock your socks off but who can't hit in the clutch or with runners in scoring position to save their lives.

Theo owns this disaster. He will live and die with it. Let's hope it's not the latter.

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The sickness known as baseball fandom.

Anyone who fancies themself as a die-hard sports fan regularly has experiences in their everyday life that puts their sporting obsession in sharp and embarrassing perspective. This morning, I had such an experience when my alarm clock went off.

You know that moment, after you've opened your eyes in the morning but aren't yet fully conscious, where the reality of whatever dreams you were having haven't completely left your system? You may wake up to find that you are not, in fact, dating a supermodel or living in a plush mansion.

I had such an experience this morning when I awoke in a cold sweat that the Sox had not yet resigned Lefty Grove for next season.

Although Grove does possess a 3.06 lifetime ERA and has been an All-Star six times, I don't know if my concern of this morning was well placed. Especially considering Grove retired in 1941.


I don't even know what kind of a dream I must have been having that would prominently feature a southpaw that last won a game for the Sox before my grandparents met, but it happened. And to be honest, I was rather pleased with myself that such a relatively obscure figure in Sox history had set up shop in my subconscious.

Fandom is a sickness, and its an even more debilitating sickness for lovers of trivial minutiae and history such as myself. Baseball is especially attractive for those of my ilk, as the numbers of the game lend itself to endless comparisons and manipulations in a way that football, basketball, and hockey statistics never will. And because baseball offers so many opportunities to observe, record, and reference the successes and failures of the past, it is a game that demands you watch as often as possible lest you miss history unfolding in real time.

I am constantly amazed at how readily the die-hards remember the important moments in a team's history. You know the idiom that everyone knows where they were when JFK was shot? Any Red Sox fan worth their salt knows where they were for Aaron Bleepin' Boone's homer, Pedro's bullpen appearance in Cleveland, the Bloody Sock, The Steal, and the Underhand to First.

And those are just playoff moments, when you were expected to be paying attention. Where were you when Varitek fed A-Rod a catcher's mitt sandwich? When Carl Everett headbutted an umpire on Family Day at Fenway? When John Valentin's knee finally blew up? When Matt Clement took a line drive off the forehead? When Trot hit that grand slam in Philadelphia on Labor Day? This year's Mother's Day Miracle? When Nomar took the fastball off the wrist? When The Trade went down? When Pedro struck out 17 in Yankee Stadium, or when he K'ed five of the six batters he faced in the '99 All-Star Game?

And these are just the memories I can clearly see from my adult life, spread over the past ten years. I'm sure Tom in Boston could fill a post with memories from 1967 alone, never mind everything that has happened since. You could remember Mo on the horse, Clemens getting ejected in the second inning and/or striking out 20...either time, Brunansky's sliding catch, Bucky Bleeping Dent, Lonborg on short rest, Teddy Ballgame getting hit on the elbow, Pesky holding the ball, Ruth getting sold, or Bill Dinneen's complete game shutout to close out the 1903 World Series.

Baseball rewards those who pay attention to such minutiae, even if those "outsiders" who don't schedule their lives around late games on the West Coast or afternoon games on the weekends think such study to be frivolous. There are certainly more valuable things for me to spend valuable brainpower on than Depression era starting pitchers.

But I'll bet you could find someone in or around the Hub with a great Lefty Grove story or two to share. And I'd love to listen.

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ARod to Boston: Pro's and Con's

As Alex Rodriguez continues to put up telephone numbers in the Bronx, his negotiating leverage continues to rise. In recent weeks, ARod's "opt out" option has become a hot topic. Today the New York Daily News reported that sources say the Sox, Larry Lucchino in particular, still would love to see ARod don a pair of carmine hose.

The question for Red Sox Nation. Do WE want him?

When faced with a decision like this, I find the old "plus and minus" format works best. Make a list of the pluses and minuses and see where that takes you. So, here we go: The Pro's and Con's of the Sox acquiring ARod.

Why we want ARod:

1. The white hot spotlight that has been burning on ARod in New York has actually been good for him. This year he has finally said "F*** You" to anyone who doesn't like him, including the estimable Captain Jetes. The result: Phenomenal numbers and a first half performance that has kept the Yankees from completely going under. ARod will be well prepared to take on the Boston press after suffering the skewering of the voracious New York media.


2. There is double pleasure in the acquisition since we not only will be getting a first ballot Hall of Famer and arguably the best player in the game today, but we will be taking him away from the Yankees. Sort of like the reverse Johnny Damon signing, other than ARod will not be breaking down in his second year here as the rapidly aging Damon has done in New York. Without ARod, what does that Yankee line up look like? No Giambi. No Sheffield. No ARod. Jeter will get his wish of having the spotlight all to himself. Sort of like Kobe Bryant did with Shaq. How did that work out for him? Anytime we can stick it to the Yanks, I'm all for it.

3. ARod to the Sox will solve the revolving shortstop problem once and for all. Rodriguez can go back to his natural position since there is no established, overrated prima donna to move as was the case in NY. Julio Lugo can move to third and shut up about it while ARod resumes his role as the best shortstop in the league. Won't it be grand when he beats out his arch nemesis Jeter for the starting spot in the All Star Game? Sweet.

4. During this contract, ARod will be mounting the only real assault on what is soon to be Barry Bonds' all time home run record. As Rodriguez gets closer to knocking Mr. Big Head out of the record books, he will be embraced by the entire baseball world. How great will it be to follow the chase from Fenway Park? Perfect.

5. We've been putting up with Manny being Manny for all these years because he puts up the numbers, and without him, who will protect Big Papi? Well, sliding ARod behind Ortiz gives the Sox the huge righthanded bat they need as Ramirez eventually fades and then is released after the 08 season. As for next season when all three are here. Well, Ortiz, ARod and Ramirez doesn't sound too bad in the three-four-five holes does it?

Why we don't want ARod

1. ARod has been a major distraction for the Yankees since he arrived. Having him and the Captain trying to coexisit has paralyzed the Bombers. Removing ARod might actually let Brian Cashman restructure the Yanks in the mold of the teams of the late 90's when it wasn't about "a superstar at every position" but more the right role players making up a team. We want ARod to stay right in the Bronx Zoo, gumming up the works.

2. It will upset the entire Sox pay scale by tieing up $30 million in ARod. What do you then tell Ortiz, Beckett, Papelbon, Youkilis as they become eligible for new contracts? No one is worth that much money. Even ARod.

3. ARod will destroy the chemistry of the Sox. They have a great clubhouse. Tek and Ortiz set the tone and everyone follows. ARod arriving in that clubhouse is like the circus coming to town. No one has ever talked about what a great teammate Rodriguez is, probably because he isn't one. He would have been a great fit on the Sox during the "25 guys and 25 cabs" days, but nowadays, things are different. ARod will upset this delicate balance.

4. The Sox need to be successful during the regular season, but the real prize is in the post season. ARod will put up dazzling numbers from April to September, but come October, Rodriguez folds up faster than your morning paper. He is abysmal in the post season and is unlikely to change. We need clutch players, not choke artists.

5. ARod is not and never has been a winner. Every team he has left was better the year after he left while the team he went to did not get appreciably better. In 2000, ARod's final year in Seattle, the Mariners went 91-71. In 2001 after ARod's departure, the M's improved by 15 wins and put up an amazing 116-46 record. Meanwhile, Texas was 71-91 in 2000. But after shelling out the biggest contract in the history of baseball to acquire ARod, the Rangers improved by a grand total of 2 wins and finished 73-89. In ARod's final year in Texas in 2003, the Rangers finished a familiar 71-91. In 2004, they suffered through the loss of Rodriquez by improving their record to 89-73, a net gain of 18 wins! Meanwhile, the Yankees, who went 101-61 in 2003 without ARod, managed to post a...you guessed it...record of 101-61 in 2004. No change.

So the number say ARod is not a difference maker. He wasn't when he left Seattle for Texas and he wasn't when he left Texas for New York. And in fact his teams have improved after his departure. The continuance of that trend should ARod comes to the Sox would be disastrous.

So where does that leave us? Well in my opinion, number 5 on the con side wins out for me. Baseball, of all sports, is a game of numbers. And in the case of ARod, the numbers do not lie. He is an awesome individual performer, but does not improve a team. In fact, the opposite is true. Let him get his big raise and stay in New York and continue to screw up the Yankees.

We don't need him here.

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All-Star Break Headlines from an Alternate Universe

BOSTON - When old-time baseball folk say you can never have enough pitching, pay attention. They know what they're talking about.

The Boston Red Sox, featuring a five-man rotation of Schilling - Beckett - Matsuzaka - Papelbon - Wakefield, have capitalized on every available opportunity and hold a 15-game lead going into the All-Star break.


Perhaps the most important decision of the season occured in spring training, when general manager Theo Epstein did not give in to the short-sighted Beantown fans and kept young gun Jonathan Papelbon in the starting rotation. Epstein, who stood behind his assertion of 2006 that Papelbon's shoulder could not maintain the rigorous demands put upon a closer, has looked like a genius as Papelbon has blossomed into a front-line starter, matching the win-loss record of pricey Japanese import Daisuke Matsuzaka in the first half.

Epstein, who confidently tabbed unheralded free agent signee Hideki Okajima as the stopper in his bullpen, has reaped dividends from Game One. Okajima has exceeded all expectations and anchored one of the best pens in baseball. Flanked by setup men Brendan Donnelly and pleasant suprise Manny Delcarmen, the Sox relievers have not wanted for Papelbon all season.

Eccentric swingman Julian Tavarez, who provided vital long-relief service earlier in the season, was able to seamlessly enter the rotation when Curt Schilling went down with an injury. Tavarez, who could easily be a fifth starter on many top MLB teams, has provided much-appreciated depth to the starting rotation all season. Ably filling the long man start in Tavarez's absence, Kason Gabbard has continued this theme of pitching depth and made the Sox core even more dangerous.

"Jon is the kind of guy who is going to excel no matter where we put him," Epstein said during the recent All-Star game festivities. "I was never naiive enough to believe we could replace the numbers he put up last year, but the trade-off of giving him the ball for six innings every fifth day has been more than worth it. It has been amazing watching the friendly competition between Paps and Daisuke as they both learn to pitch in the bigs, and we're looking forward to watching them pitch on consecutive days for the better part of the next ten years."

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Time for TitoBall

Okay. To Kevin from New York's point, all that matters is the numbers. Best record in baseball. 10 game lead in the AL East.

But let's not fool ourselves. The Sox have the same record they had last year. The only reason they have a double digit lead in the division instead of the 4 game bulge they enjoyed last year at the break is because the Yankees and Blue Jays have been so impotent so far.

I don't believe that will continue. And the SS Sox has started springing some leaks, most particularly in their inability to score any runs or hit in the clutch. So how do we capitalize on the big lead and the futility of the East pretenders and cruise to our first division crown in ten years?

As the second half begins, it's time to roll out some TitoBall.


TitoBall you ask? Why it's version of BillyBall, popularized by Billy Martin in the early 80's. The fiery manager used this aggressive style of play to revive a moribund Oakland A's team that climbed from last place in the AL West in 1979 to second place in 1980.

Martin had a dominating pitching staff but a lineup that could not score runs. Sound familiar? Martin used every hocus pocus trick in the book, from the hit and run, double steal, and sacrifice bunt to the hidden ball trick. He tried anything he could to score runs so his strong pitching staff could take over. And it worked.

It's obvious the Sox have become a collection of Punch and Judy hitters (from Baseball Slang Dictionary: "Punch and Judy Hitter refers to a competent but light-hitting batsmen who keeps his job by racking up singles, infield hits and sacrifice bunts.") Again, sound familar? So with Papi and Manny now working on their averages instead of thumping the long ball, Tito should consider playing LittleBall to get some runs for his outstanding pitching staff.

And why not?

We have all been playing the percentage game. You know: "If the Sox play .500 ball for the rest of the year, the Yankees would have to play xxxx percent baseball to catch them." Well how would you feel if the Sox could play .750 ball the rest of the way? Pretty good, I'll bet.

In the first half, the Sox compiled an impressive 46-15 record when scoring 3 runs or more. That's .754 baseball. So then let's shoot for the magic number - 3 - every game! And let's not wait until the end of the game to do it. Let's play for one run at a time right out of the gate until we hit three. From there, the odds of victory swing dramatically in the favor of the Sox.

And ironically, this year Tito has the weapons to do it.

They have great OBP guys in Youkilis, Drew, Pedroia, Papi. They have speed in Lugo, Crisp and Drew. They have guys that can handle the bat in Varitek and Lowell. Crisp leads off with a walk or hit? Move him immediately into scoring position with a steal, hit and run or sacrifice. Score a run an inning in the first three and we're on our way.

Sure I know that the Sox fans would much rather see Earl Weaver Ball - "The key to winning baseball games is pitching, fundamentals, and three run homers"- but it has become painfully obvious that the Sox have fewer and fewer hitters who can belt three run homers. Papi and Manny are not doing it and how much longer can Lowell keep it up?

And I don't know about you, but if I have to keep watching Ortiz, Ramirez and Drew stranding runners in scoring position, I am going to take up projectile vomiting. So let's face the facts. The Big Bad Sox have become the Go Go Sox, the Hitless Wonders. Let's adjust the style of play to fit the talent. After all, we all know that you win championships with pitching and defense, so we are in good shape there. We just need to scratch out enough runs so Beckett, Dice K and the rest of the staff can rack up the w's.

Let the TitoBall Era begin!

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Half way home

Here's the short and dirty version: 53-34 (.609) with a 10-game lead in the American League East.

Any evaluation of this team at the midway mark has to start and end with these numbers, which are the only ones that make any difference in the end.


For all the flaws this team has exhibited in the last month, they still possess the best winning percentage in Major League Baseball, and that surely means a lot more things are being done right than wrong on Yawkey Way. Keeping the status quo as we approach the trade deadline, however, tends to be a losing proposal to teams looking to make a serious playoff run. So before the trade talks heat up to match the weather, here are five predictions I have for moves that should or should not be executed before we're through with July.

1. Julio Lugo isn't going anywhere. Our current shortstop is cruising just below the Mendoza line as he takes his well-earned three day midsummer vacation, and armchair general managers have been floating speculative trades since the beginning of May. In reality, however, Lugo is a player this front office has wanted for a long time, and I have no doubt that he will spend the entirety of his current four-year contract in Boston. Some players are able to quickly adjust to playing in the Hub (Mike Lowell, Curt Schilling, Kevin Millar, David Ortiz) and others can take up to a year to really settle in (Josh Beckett, Johnny Damon, Coco Crisp if his current streak is the real deal). Lugo appears to fall into the latter category. Everyone has said this is a guy who will thrive in such a baseball hotbed, and it appears to me that he's twisting himself up in knots as a result of his failures to date. Once he settles in, I have no doubt he'll have a torrid four weeks or so and end the season with respectable if not outstanding numbers, and next year we can expect to see the player we thought we signed last winter.

2. We should see if anyone is interested in Coco Crisp. The flip side of Mr. Lugo is Mr. Crisp. I was a little confused when we aquired Coco on his current deal as he was clearly blocking top Sox prospect Jacoby Ellsbury from picking up playing time on the big club. At the time, I guessed that the club was planning on dealing Crisp when Ellsbury was ready, as Crisp's contract is quite manageable and he'd be a major upgrade in center field for a lot of clubs. Unfortunately, Crisp has had no trade value since the moment he signed his contract...until now. Crisp's current hot streak could very well be the real deal; on the other hand, it could be another illusion. If Theo can find another GM who thinks this is what Coco will bring to the table for the next two years, he should pick up as much as he can and plug Jacoby into the center of the Fenway outfield; if nobody is interested, we can drop Ellsbury back down to Pawtucket, ride out Coco for the rest of the 2007 campaign, and focus on moving him and clearing the way for Jacoby in November.

3. Find another starter. With Mark Buehrle signing a four-year deal with the ChiSox, there doesn't appear to be many available top-of-the-rotation starters on the trading block, but there is a lot of baseball left to be played before the trading deadline hits. Right now, we have two guys in the rotation who are really long-relief/spot-starters (Tavarez and Gabbard); one has been holding down the fort all season, and the other appears to be locked in until Schilling finally pulls himself together. I'm not going to be holding my breath waiting for Schill's return, and I'd much rather not have to watch these guys pitch on back-to-back days anymore. If Theo can make any magic happen here for a #3 type starter without mortgaging the farm, he'll be a hero. Could it be Jeff Suppan 2.0? Of course - but it really couldn't be much worse than that, could it?

4. Keep the young guns in Portland and Pawtucket. Although I don't want Gabbard and Tavarez anchoring the rotation any longer than they absolutely have to, I want even less to see Lester, Buchholz, or Bowden rushed to the big club to provide a quick fix. These guys are the future, and the way to best prepare them for the playoff marches of the next decade is to let them continue to grow in the minor leagues. We have a ten game cushion right now - there's no need to put any of these guys in a "sink or swim" environment.

5. Call up the Yankees and offer to take Roger Clemens' bloated contract off their floundering roster, as the Pinstripes are shaping up to be sellers at the deadline. Just kidding.

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Can we keep him??? Please, can we???

I absolutely know better. I understand I am getting swept up in the hysteria. I realize it is a very "pink-hatted" thing to say, but I'm going to say it anyway.

I want Jacoby Ellsbury to stay with the big club.


I know that the flashy rookie was only up for a cup of coffee and is now heading back to Pawtucket. But does he have to leave? Why can't Jacoby stay with us?

As an aside, every time I see Ellsbury's name it brings back memories of a long ago Fantasy Baseball draft. The Cleveland Indians had a third baseman back in the 80's named Brooks Jacoby. We had a...shall we say....confused owner who when realizing he was still available, and evidently reading from a printed sheet that listed players last name first, yelled out when it was his turn to draft, "I'll take Jacoby Brooks!" For the next fifteen years whether it was in our baseball or football fantasy draft, someone would offer at some time during the proceedings, "Jacoby Brooks is still available!" The thought of someone with a first name of Jacoby struck us as amusing.

No one is laughing anymore.

Ellsbury was taken in the first round in 2005 and almost immediately was annointed the next Johnny Damon. Incredibly, he does look like he is heading down that path. Granted it is very early, but everytime he is on the field, something exciting seems to happen.

When was the last time, if ever, you saw a major leaguer, let alone a Red Sox player, score from second on a pass ball like Ellsbury did the other day? So why are we in such a rush to send him back down Route 95? Why can't he stay in Boston and learn about winning a division title and getting into the playoffs? Doesn't he look like a great fourth outfielder?

Oh yes, we already have one of those. His name is Wily Mo Pena. But... how do I put this delicately? Wily Mo is.....useless.

Let's list the pro's and con's of keeping Ellsbury over Pena.

1. Ellsbury can play all three outfield positions. Pena is a butcher in all three outfield positions.
2. Ellsbury can make contact. Pena is hitting .216 and strikes out once every 2.5 at bats.
3. Ellsbury doesn't have long ball power. Pena is big.
4. Ellsbury can pinch run. That might be important at some point. See: Roberts, Dave. Pena is big.
5. Ellsbury is so fast, even a routine ground ball can become a hit. Pena is big.
6. Ellsbury puts pressure on the defense every time he puts the ball in play. Pena is big.

So tell me again why we keep Pena aka "Mr. Potential" around? Let's send him to Pawtucket and if he gets claimed by some sadomasochistic GM that enjoys watching a human windmill, at least Theo's will save the $3 million dollar salary.

I know I'm jumping the gun. My baseball head tells me that Ellsbury needs to go down and play regularly to continue his development. I know that staying in Boston and playing on a part time basis is not the best thing for him. But everytime I see Pena look like a confused little leaguer at the plate or the loser in a three legged race in the outfield I want to throw up.

These two things appear to be unimpeachable. 1. Pena stinks. 2. Ellsbury looks like he will be a star.

What are we waiting for?

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Should we O.K. Oki?

I'm not that old, and even I can remember a time when baseball's All-Star Game was the most important sporting event of the summer. Wondering how the stars of each league, who as far as we knew had only seen each other on ESPN highlights, would fare against each other in direct competition provided conversation fodder for weeks. But now with interleague play and the ever-prevalent free agent swapping, the All Star Game has lost its magic. No matter how much Bud Selig tries to convince us that "this time it counts," the All-Star Game is the primary casualty of the unbalanced interleague schedule.

And because this game has lost so much of its luster, I've reached the point in my fandom that I'd much rather see members of the hometown team take a three-day vacation than risk injury in a meaningless pickup game. If the league isn't going to preserve the history of this game, why should I as a fan?

And that is why I will not be voting for Hideki Okajima to be the 32nd man on the American League club.

I'm one of the biggest baseball traditionalists there is. I have been known to let my opinion of a player be dramatically skewed if he wears his socks high. I'll always prefer eye black to sunglasses. I think day games are a gift from the baseball gods and playoff games ending after midnight do nobody any good. I think a well-turned double play is the definition of poetry in motion, and I really believe that the changing of the seasons is a function of the baseball schedule and not the other way around.

And I love the history of the All-Star Game. Hearing those war stories from the old days where the league presidents would give rah-rah speeches before the game and imply this game was secondary in importance only to the World Series. When the All-Star Game was a place for players to showcase their skills on the grandest stage, rather than at the sideshow it has now become. When players actually played during the game, rather than making cameo appearances. And, most importantly, when the All-Star Game presented possibly the only opportunity some players would ever have to face their cross-league rivals.

I understand a lot of this changed with free agency, and I feel that can't be helped. But I can remember the All-Star Game carrying a huge amount of weight as recently as 1993, when a much-younger Randy Johnson unleashed his 6'10" frame on the terrorized National League, culminating with John Kruk's embarrasing four-pitch strikeout. We knew what Randy Johnson had to offer, but the National League hitters had only gotten to see as much of him as I had, sitting in my living room. How would they handle him when he was 60 feet 6 inches away?

But with interleague play, this thrill is gone. How will Barry Bonds handle Josh Beckett? We already saw that. What about Greg Maddux hooking up with David Ortiz? Been there.

Major League Baseball sacrificed the Midsummer Classic at the altar of increased revenue, and I'm sure they have no regrets. Television ratings for these games are sky-high, after all. So perhaps congratulations are in order. But the price has been paid, and I for one hope to enjoy the performance of Jeremy Bonderman, Kelvim Escobar, Roy Halladay, or Pat Neshek in a couple of weeks.

I'd rather reward Oki's All-Star first-half with a vacation. And he can take Beckett with him.

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Time to Shuffle the Deck?

Exactly when did the Red Sox turn into the 1906 Chicago White Sox, aka the "Hitless Wonders?" For those unfamiliar, the Pale Hose of 100 years ago won a World Championship with dominating pitching and anemic hitting.

After their June Swoon, this year's Carmine Hose appear to be heading down the same path. However, whether they can duplicate the '06 championship feat with their lineup bumbling along as it has been is debatable. It may be time for a shakeup.

The 1906 White Sox featured dominating pitching with two 20 game winners and a four man starting rotation none of whom had an ERA higher than 2.33. However their hitting was brutal, with a team high batting average of .230. No regular topped .279 and no one drove in more than 80 runs. Of course, they had an excuse. It was the Dead Ball Era.

These days, the only "dead balls" appear to be coming off the Red Sox' bats. They hit .264 in June, but only .218 with runners in scoring position. They scored only 112 runs in the month, compared to 155 in May. They put up 2 runs or less in 13 games. Amazingly, they won 5 of those. Overall, they were 13-14 in the month. And with another depressing 2-1 loss to Texas on Sunday and despite a mini-breakout last night, July is not starting out any better.

Now I know I'm not a big league manager or general manager, but if my Strat-O-Matic team was performing like the current Sox, I would be shuffling my player cards in an attempt to make something happen. I realize you can't move real humans around like cards - they are a lot bigger and heavier - but let's make believe we could. Herewith, my modest proposal for shaking the Sox out of the doldrums.

The main order of business would be to rearrange the batting order, including moving the big boys around. Let's face it, Papi and Manny have not been Papi and Manny for a while, so leaving them in the three and four spots is part of the problem. I understand that moving either one of them is akin to painting the Statue of Liberty lime green, but desperate times call for desperate measures. And watching the Sox these days has become painful. It's time for radical surgery.

So here is my revised lineup.

1. Dustin Pedroia
2. Coco Crisp
3. Kevin Youkilis
4. David Ortiz
5. Manny Ramirez
6. J. D. Drew
7. Mike Lowell
8. Jason Varitek
9. Julio Lugo/Alex Cora (platoon).

Here is my reasoning.

First, Pedroia is quickly become a prototypical Jamesian leadoff hitter. He works the pitcher, rarely strikes out and has a high on base percentage. He is Kevin Youkilis without the ugly goatee and less about 30 pounds.

As for Coco in the number two slot? The player the Sox traded for last year had his best year in 2005 with Cleveland. That year he hit .300 with a .345 OBP, .465 OPS and .810 slugging percentage. And where did he hit that year? You got it. Number two, right behind Grady Sizemore.

Youk hitting third is a no brainer. He is currently the best hitter on the team. Yes, you give up some power, but not that much as things are going now. Youk has 9 homers to 11 for Manny and 13 for Papi.

Ortiz moving into the four hole might take some pressure off him or at least give him a change of scenery.

Manny moving to number 5 gives the Sox the best fifth hitter they have had since Trot was in there hitting homers and knocking in runs.

Drew slipping down to six also strengthens the lineup. He is an overpaid flop as a five hitter, but at number six he doesn't look too bad.

Lowell, once his thumbs heal, gives you another potent bat in the seven spot.

Tek is solid and a nice bat at eight.

Let's just call a spade a spade and say that for the forseeable future, Lugo is a part time player. Go with a strict platoon with Alex Cora which puts both of them in the best position to succeed.

So take another look at that lineup. The only real hole is number nine and Cora can come up with the big hit occasionally and Lugo will break out at some point. But 1 through 5 is solid and can be spectacular, 6-8 should be "professional" ie eat a lot of pitches, occasional power and potential timely hitting. You also get a nice balance of R-S-R-L-R-L-R-S-L/R. Opposing managers can't bring in one reliever for more than one hitter in the later innings.

That's my solution. Let's give it a whirl. I bet it would work in Strat-O-Matic.

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